
I like wine. This should not be a surprise to anyone if you’ve been reading this blog for any amount of time. I like to try new wines and I like learning about all the different kind of wines that are out there. Of course, I don’t know as much about wine as say, Gary Vaynerchuk, but I’m always willing to learn.
Quite a few of my friends also like wine in the same way that I do, so we share different thoughts and ideas with each other. My wine tastes have evolved over time, and now I am primarily a red drinker- mostly red zins and pinot noirs, but in the summertime I enjoy an occasional glass of chilled chardonnay and I’m always up for some bubbly- as long as it’s not too sweet.
I also like to entertain, and it seems that a proper gift to bring to someone’s house is wine. I will certainly encourage gifts of wine, HOWEVER, if you are going to a person’s house and 1. you intend to bring wine 2. you know the homeowner likes wine, and 3. that homeowner is me- take note of the two most important rules:
DO NOT, under any circumstance, bring anything that is pink. If it’s pink, it can’t possibly be wine. It might as well be kool-aid.
Also, do not bring wine in a box. Wine does not come in a box. It comes in a bottle- a glass bottle- with a cork.
If you are the unfortunate soul who shows up at my house with wine in a box, you will be banished forever.
Moving on, if you are giving a gift of wine and the recipient is a fan of wine, please ask what kind of wine they like, or even more specifically, if they would prefer something specific. If you do not do these things, don’t be insulted if the wine you brought doesn’t get opened during dinner.
Someone actually brought something called “Rose table wine” to my house once. I was appalled. I refused to open it, but the hubby wanted to be all polite and shit, so he opened the bottle and poured me a glass. There was sediment in my glass and it tasted like it came from the river. I immediately poured it out and replaced it with something much more acceptable. Perhaps that sounds a little rude to do in front of guests, but I had known them for a long time, so it was OK. Not something I would have done in front of casual acquaintances, but I still wouldn’t have drunk the wine.
This brings me to the description of various wines. A few weeks ago, one of my friends posted that he was drinking “yummy wine”. Naturally, I asked what kind of wine, since I’m always looking to try something new. His answer- Spanish.
It’s a shame he couldn’t see me, because I did the whole **blink twice, are you serious** kind of thing. Clearly a person who knows absolutely nothing about wine and how to describe it to others.
Then, just yesterday, @ianirwin tweeted that he was buying wine. Once again, I asked what kind.
His answer- white.
Oh. My. God. Are you fucking kidding me??? Is it because the two people in questions are men, or do people in general think these are acceptable answers?
Let me tell you something. They are not the least bit acceptable. Observe the chart:
Answer type- What kind of wine are you drinking?
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Really fucking stupid
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white
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red
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Spanish/French/etc
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Good/bad/etc
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Mediocre
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Pinot Grigio
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Red Zinfandel
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Spanish red, French white, etc
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Not great, a little sweet
|
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Acceptable
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Cavit Pinot Grigio
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7 Deadly Zins
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A French Merlot
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Dry, but light and fruity.
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Preferred
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2006 Cavit Pinot Grigio
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2006 Lodi 7 Deadly Zins
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Chateau Coufran Merlot from Medoc, bottled in 2005.
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On the dry side, full bodied, with a blackberry finish.
|
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Wine expert
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The 2006 Cavit Pinot Grigio has crisp, light character, bright straw gold color, and appealing fruit flavors and refreshing scents.
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The 2006 7 Deadly Zins has a vibrant, sweet bouquet of raspberry jam, molasses and cinnamon toast evoke the senses of carefree youthful nights. Excellent oak integration provides silken tannins and spice to pair with Lodi’s unrestricted wild berry fruit.
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Has crushed blackberry, licorice and light toasty oak on the nose. Full-bodied, with polished tannins and focused blackberry and currant on the palate, with a hint of vanilla and spices. Made mostly from Merlot. Best after 2011
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Beautiful stuff: bottle whiffs of fresh unbaked crescent rolls, transmutes to nose of dark plum & black and blueberry, to full fruit mouth feel of black cherry. Deep color black purple semi-translucent with stout structure while still soft to the palette
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Please keep this in mind if you are ever asked to describe wine in the future. Wine has a color, it comes from a grape (the varietal), or a combination of grapes and it also has a region. The region of the wine is determined by where the grapes were grown. As far as taste is concerned- good, bad, yucky are not acceptable answers. Most wines are classified as dry or sweet and there is also a range from light to very full-bodied. Some have fruit flavors, some have vegetable flavors- there is an endless possibility and everyone’s palete is different.
So, the next time that I ask you what kind of wine you are drinking/buying, please respond with a somewhat intelligent answer.